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Sunday 25 September 2016


Everything is good right now.  Really good.  I am really working hard right now on staying focused in the present and manifesting positive energy.  That sounds so wrong coming from me.  I can hear past versions of myself laughing at the hippie nonsense I’m spewing, but I’m on the manifesting ship!  Toot! Toot!

And I don’t mean only thinking positive.  I mean taking away the negative self-doubt that often leads to self-sabotage before you even try.  I am spending a lot of time on self-care and prioritizing self-care.  Eating right, meditating, ritual, writing, exercising.  Who am I?!  A big part of self-care is looking out for all aspects of self: mind, body, heart, & soul.  It takes a lot of time.  Making time for it seems hard at first.  In fact, I failed a lot.  It has taken me nearly a year to actually realize the importance of making these things a priority.  Yet, it seems to yield positive results.  Life has been pretty sweet and everything is on an upswing.

This makes me nervous.  When life gets too good, I get anxious, as if I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.  My big focus now is to steer the conversation in my head away from that part that catastrophizes every scenario, especially my love life.  When I feel myself start up that spiral, I need to exercise particular care.  I need to concentrate on grounding all the other aspects of myself to bring my mind back in check.  When there is balance, there is clarity… and peace. 

I’ll use this time to ground my meditation and writing practices.  To organize my time so that my self-care times become sacred.  We have lost the importance of honouring rituals.  We pay them no mind because they don’t fit well into our busy lives, but they are the things that hold us on this Earth.  Without them, we drift away.  Making those few moments sacred to yourself, gives you worth.  When you see your own worth, others can’t ignore it.  It ripples through the world. 

This is what I mean by manifesting positive energy.  You are a mirror and reflect whatever you give.  Therefore, when you make yourself important to you, you become important to others.  What I have learned repeatedly through my therapy process is that the path that you can see, is rarely the one that leads you to the outcome you desire.  As the fox says, “One sees clearly only with the heart.  Anything essential is invisible to the eyes.” (Antoine de Saint-ExupĂ©ry)